āHope is absolutely fantastic,ā Trump said in a statement to the NYT released through a spokesman Friday.
Of course he did. Iāll bet Melania thinks so, too.
āHope is absolutely fantasticā
Has he ever even said something like that about his own fucking wife?
āFantasticā
I remember him excitedly saying the same thing about Trump Steaks.
For a guy who hates the fucking NYT so much, he sure as hell canāt wait to be quoted by them.
Was Hope Hicks the spokesperson he issued the response through? Would we even notice it if he had? Anyway this is the invariable pattern. Of course Trump is raging and storming at her behind the scenes because he always needs someone to blame whose name is not Donald Trump. And of course sheās more perfect than perfection itself when the media ask, because nothing is ever less than perfect in TrumpWorldĀ®. And of course Ivanka shoehorns in a little shot at Kelly because sheās not quite the icky-sweet nice person she was widely described as not so long ago. Total constant chaos, dysfunction, and lying. Making America Great Again one drunken-stumbling disaster at a time.
From that picture, I can only infer that Hope Hicks is deeply pondering the great, eternal question of human existence: Salvatore Ferragamo or Jimmy Choo?
So, Hope, who are you going to hook up with next? Richard Spencer?
I would still recommend that Hope carry pepper spray, mace and brass knuckles in her purse.
Just sayinā
From WaPo today, hereās the relevant quote from the article:
In his campaign memoir āLet Trump Be Trump,ā Lewandowski described the unusual breadth of Hicksās responsibilities.
āWhen we landed, it was Hopeās job to steam him. āGet the machine!ā heād yell,ā Lewandowski wrote. āAnd Hope would take out the steamer and start steaming Mr. Trumpās suit, while he was wearing it! Sheād steam the jacket first and then sit in a chair in front of him and steam his pants.ā
You have to admit ā thatās pretty āfantasticā.
There are certain battery-powered devices that would make much better companions than the men sheās had relationships with lately.
Hell, the last time someone steamed my pants, it cost me a hundred bucks!
āMuch better than Stormy Danielsā¦ uh, whoever that is.ā
You know you have bad taste in men when you have to carry combat supplies in your Hermes clutch.
āā¦and she didnāt cost $130K, either! Bada-boom! Bada-bing!ā
My thought exactly!
Gee, when was the last time Two Scoops said ANYTHING nice about Malaria? Ever?
She must be fit to be tied after hearing all this praise heaped on his main squeeze!
So, does she actually service Trumpenstein in the Oval Office? I mean, sheās banged from what we read just about every senior WH stafferā¦Pence excluded of course since he couldnāt find his penis with a huge magnifying glass, now could he?
Of course sheās fantastic. In fact, according to Comrade Cockholster sheās the best piece of ass Lewandowski ever had. High praise from a serial sexual predator.
Funny thing is, no matter how much Donald treats Melanoma like shit, I still donāt have any sympathy for her whatsoever.
Yet.