I am Pancho Villa…here to defile your country. And I have dealt with that most of my life, when in the company of racists. But I have ways of being able to fend this off. Associating with like-minded people, fair people. Placing myself in social environments with less racism (when I am in the U.S.). And, when in Latin America, my position is ironically in the (unwanted) position of being part of a gender doing most of the oppressing…all the while experiencing near zero racism against ME.
To be a member of a gender forced to deal with sexist behaviour is a burden shared by individuals for whom I have overwhelming respect and admiration.
Been there. I was criticized as a young associate in a law office for getting along well with the female support staff (as opposed to hanging out with the male lawyers).
“Emotional Control Is How Women Handle Everyday Sexism”
So true! A woman could never fly off the handle or be labeled too “emotional”. A woman could never be strong or be labeled a bitch. A woman can never get teary or weep, again she’d be labeled too “emotional”…of course boner and bushie wept all the time, but that was labeled as empathetic.
There is a double standard for women. And each and every woman that has had to overcome this crap in the work place knows it!
Un vato loco (buddy of mine) some months ago disclosed to me that what Hill’s Presidency will make unfold will be monumental and vastly important to millions of daughters.
OR, as upper management, the lower male managers assume to ask YOU to fetch their coffee…
OR, answer their phones, OR type their crap!
OR, during the hiring process you are expected to take a typing test, while they waltz in without having to do so. (I guess I’m showing my age. But that happened all the time back in day!)
When you say hell no I will fire your ass for insubordination, you’re the bitch…when all along, they’re the assholes.
I wonder if the women who came to prominence in other countries, Great Britain, Israel, Germany, Pakistan, Ireland, etc., had to endure this disgusting treatment on their way to top, or is it limited to our male-centric society promulgated by trumpet like creatures who I would pray are not everywhere in the world.
Allow me to speak to the flip side. I am loud, aggressive and hot-tempered. All my life I have hit back verbally at anyone who spoke to me with anything less than respect - even bosses. And boy oh boy have I suffered for it.
Women who are not “cold,” are condemned as bitches, as unstable, as crazy, as hysterical, as unpredictable, as unreliable, as untrustworthy - as everything Donald Trump is but never gets called out for because he has that ultimate get-out-of-criticism-free card: a penis.
Yep, been there. Being in the tech world I’ve experienced similar, hell i was just on a call, guy asked a question I answered, he ignored me, waited for another male to join the call, asked the same question, got the exact same answer/explanation and this time he was OK with the answer. Good thing there’s a mute button because my “WTF?! Did I NOT just say the same thing?” could not be internalized
Yea love that… had a new client do exactly that, told the boss to fetch everyone coffee while I signed the contract. I smiled, passed the paperwork to her and said: here you go, I’ll go for the coffee. Had a Sr VP immediately follow me out and bitched that I should have clued them in. My response was just who do you think the Susan was in Susan xxxxxx Associates, he responded by saying they thought the name was just a front so that we could claim “Women, minority owned”.
Last night, she should have smiled, any time she said something. She should have sat down the whole time, hunched over to make herself smaller. She should have worn pink, not red and black. She should have worn a frilly blouse, not a tailored jacket. She should have had longer and wavier hair. She should have worn a skirt and higher heels.
Ha this has happened to me too, in tech. I was supposed to be interviewing a developer candidate once. I was sharing an office, guy walks into my office and up to my male office-mate and introduces himself as the candidate. I told him I’d be interviewing him and he looked really surprised. In a lot of ways, tech is better than other fields re: overt sexism - generally no explicit wage gaps, people tend to be open-minded, etc. But in other ways, it reveals how institutionalized our stereotypes really are - you see the most liberal of men who have no intention of being sexist, and would abhor overtly sexist behavior, enforce gender stereotypes all the time.
