Discussion for article #227436
Quick question: Why is TPM calling it the “Alleged Rice Elevator Incident”?
What part of the incident is alleged?
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These two are in serious need of counseling. And that is no excuse for hitting a woman.
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As an armchair psychologist, with years of training in living, I see two people who have never had to be adults, using their talent and looks as crutches instead. Once they were well lubricated and in close proximity in the elevator with no one else there, they acted like the 6 year olds they both were stuck on. Counseling will help them, but being forced to grow up will work a lot better.
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I didn’t watch the video. It’s not like I need reminding that this kind of violence exists. But this all leaves me confused. Not sure what to make of this story. Not sure it should even be in my consciousness. It’s their lives. Clearly she’s standing with him/by him - she married him after the incident. So I just have no idea. I think the Ravens did the right thing - must respond publicly and harshly to that kind of violence towards a woman. But clearly the wife herself is not asking for help, is not responding to any doors for help that this public airing might be opening. At least not yet. Maybe they really did go through some kind of process together. Or maybe they will a long time from now. I just don’t know. The whole thing feels awful, but it also feels voyeuristic at this point. It all feels like speculations, and personality speculation, in someone’s private life where I don’t need to be. Can there be legal repercussions for him if she doesn’t press charges?
“No cops.”
It is voyeuristic, but hopefully in the service of an important goal.
Professional sports may or may not have more of a spousal abuse problem than other professions/groups, but it definitely has the most visible problem. All the decades of letting things slide or letting the couple/player/team work it out in private have been delivering the wrong message.
It is our business, because we all live with or among people who are influenced by what happens in the world of professional athletics, because we as taxpayers provide a huge amount of direct and indirect subsidies to professional sports teams, because we are the ultimate source of team revenue, and, because the whole nation is harmed when laws, like taxes, are only for the “little people.”
As I said yesterday, it’s a rare example of a case in which they could drop the “alleged” and remain confident they wouldn’t get sued for defamation.
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I rather expect there are a lot of women who managed to extricate themselves from abusive relationships without getting killed who are processing what she’s saying and how she’s acting rather differently than you. Because what you are perceiving as the willful decision of an autonomous woman is awfully consistent with the behavior of millions upon millions of women–and men–before her who’ve been the victims of spousal abuse.
I suggest you watch it. He didn’t simply punch her. He wound up and knocked her out cold with a single punch as casually as you or I might slap a wall or wave our arms during an argument. And then he he proceeded to treat her as if her being rendered unconscious was a terrible annoyance to him. He’s a football player. He knows far better than most that unconsciousness from a head injury is a very serious matter. And he didn’t call 911. He didn’t drop to his knees and say oh my god, what have I done. No, he tried to drag her out of the elevator like she was an inconvenient burden.
In my opinion, she’ll be lucky to get out of that relationship alive.
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^This
They look like a plain 'ole young dumb couple who fight each other. They probably don’t need counseling as much as they need the fear of God put in them in order for them to realize that they could lose everything by fighting like they normally do.
I thing that’s a bit over the top. The look like a couple who fight back and forth. Neither of them seemed to be at all intimidated by the other, nor did they look uncomfortable in fight. Couples like that exist all over the place and it’s normally a consequence being young and stupid. They’ll probably grow out it.
Losing the 4 million dollars Ray was going to make this year will probably help them grow up faster, and draw a “no hitting each other” line in the sign.
You’re right. Lord knows I knocked out lots of girlfriends when I was young. Dragged them around like sacks of cement afterwards, until they came to. No biggie.
They’re just “young and stupid”??? Ray Rice is 27 years old, and has a 3 year old daughter. What on earth are you talking about?
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So are you saying that you used to get into physical fights with your significant other when you were younger and grew out of it?
Not sure what world you are living in, but this is not an issue of age. There are abusive people of all ages, and brushing it off as an issue of age that they will grow out of is stupid.
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Hop
In all due respect to your training and experience, let me say that these are two adults who have not been fully socialized.
They have not learned that certain behaviors just are not acceptable among grown-ups. I was about 12 when my dad told me to never, but never, hit a woman. It is a mark of a coward and a loser and might get you sent to prison.
And this woman never learned to have enough self-respect so as not to hang on to an abusive husband as a meal ticket. Guess her mother never told her.
For chrissakes, kids are taught in kindergarten to keep their hands off of others.
But the NFL never even saw the low-quality video until yesterday. Yeah, that’s the ticket. Because the NFL never gets what it wants, such as its own protectionist measures passed by the US Congress, for example.
Roger Goodell: “What? There’s a video?” Better make it a 3 game suspension.
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There is nothing normal about punching your spouse. NOTHING. AT. ALL. NORMAL.
The reprehensable thing here is that he wasn’t arrested.
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I didn’t say it was normal as in most couples do it. I said that when it happens, it is normally being done by young, stupid people.
Have you never known a couple who fought?
No, actually, it isn’t. It’s normally done by people throughout their lives and who rarely ever change that kind of behavior.
So then, a couple consisting of two 60-years olds is as likely to get into a physical fight as a couple consisting of 20-year olds?